As I sit here midwinter in 2014, wishing that this picture was the view I had outside my verandah door, I can only say, I hate my life as it is.. some days! There are many parts to it that I detest right now… Like the fact that I am working for minimum wage, have no life or dental insurance and I’m over the hill… past 30!
LOL… if you are 60 you will get the joke. I have been trying to make something of myself for years… I’m a little closer but nowhere as close as I would like to be. I have lots of thoughts in my head that I need to get out before I explode, but I know a lot of it will make people very unhappy… some may even try to sue me… most likely someone who thinks I have money.. haha!
Well disclaimer should be, “I have no money so you can’t sue me for stating my opinions and views of life! :P” I do have dreams of one day becoming a self-made millionaire… I absolutely believe it. The only reason I want to be is to live comfortably… Not gold toilet seat comfortable, not ’10-senseless-cars-because-you-can-drive-only-one-at-a-time-anyway’ comfortable… I am a simple person with simple needs. I just want to pay off all my debts so I can be free, so I can live without worry that if I falter in one experience it won’t wreck my life. I worry too much? There is no such thing. I am past 30, waste a lot of time and see firsthand where I am headed… and it’s not to millionaire status.
I’ve always said if I win the lotto I would just pay off everything me and my family owes and then the remainder goes to close friends who have supported me throughout the years. You can actually hold me to that, because I also have a pretty bad guilty conscience, LOL. Are people even allowed to use “LOL” in blogs?
Now where was I?? Oh yes life pretty much has gone back to Sucking! I just took 3 weeks of work and It was amazing. I went to New York, which normally isn’t my cup of tea because I don’t particularly like big cities but there was something special about New York that made me not want to leave… but that will be a whole other blog! But the point is, when I was given 5 shifts for the month, my immediate reaction was negative.
I found a way to turn it into a positive. The one way I can know that I am happy is ultimately waking up and knowing I am contributing something to the world, not merely existing. This is why I attribute it to paying off all our debts. To not have the corporate world defining your worth to the world.