16 Things You Don’t Owe Anybody (Though It Often Feels Like You Do)

16 Things You Don’t Owe Anybody (Though It Often Feels Like You Do)

Great Thoughts Here!

Thought Catalog


1. An outward appearance that aligns with what other people deem appropriate and ideal. Too often I hear people hesitate to, say, get a tattoo or dye their hair or wear something “funky” out of fear of what the parents or friends or so-and-so’s in their lives will say and think. Those other people do not have ownership of your body, and it’s audacious of them to think that their opinions on what you choose to do with it matter.

2. Explanations for why you put your job first. I used to be a bona fide work-a-holic, but recently I’ve found that it’s far more important that I divide my time equally and healthfully. However, there’s one major catch: sometimes we have to prioritize, and work has to come first. It’s not about not caring about others or not “having a life,” but about the fact that you want to…

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Why Paychecks Don’t Mean Anything (And I’m Not Just Saying That Because I Don’t Get One)


Thought Catalog

Screen Shot 2014-04-21 at 4.29.39 PM

That’s right people. I work 8:30- 5:00 pm, Monday through Friday, sometimes Saturdays. I work a minimum of 40 hours a week. Sounds normal right? Wrong because, at the end of the two week pay period, I do not receive a paycheck. I receive pay through a bi-monthly “Living Allowance” that totals about $406 dollars after taxes. I work for a local nonprofit organization that gets money from VISTA, a federally funded subset of AmeriCorps that focuses on fighting poverty in the U.S. The most interesting factor? That “service members earn wages near the poverty line by design, so they are able to gain an understanding of the people they help and how best to serve them.”

In the beginning, I was a little skeptical about joining a national service because of this. I thought over and over about how I was going to survive with this type of pay…

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Life in the 1500s


 The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn’t just how you like it or think there’s nothing to eat when you look into a half full fridge, think about how things used to be . Here are some facts about the 1500s:  

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and still smelled pretty good by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married. 

   Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean wat

Having a bath in the 21st century is more of a luxury than we think

Having a bath in the 21st century is more of a luxury than we think

er, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, Don’t throw the baby out with the Bath water.. 

   Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying . It’s raining cats and dogs. 

   There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house.. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That’s how canopy beds came into existence. 

   The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, Dirt poor. The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entranceway. Hence the saying a thresh hold.

 (Getting quite an education, aren’t you?)

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while.  Hence the rhyme, Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old.. 


Fresh meals everyday should not be taken for granted!

Fresh meals everyday should not be taken for granted!

 Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, bring home the bacon  They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and chew the fat.. 

   Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous. 

   Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.

   Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake. 

     England is old and small and the local folks started running out of  places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they  would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be, saved by the bell or was considered a …dead ringer.. 

  And that’s the truth. Now, whoever said History was boring ! ! ! 

   Educate someone. Share these facts with a friend.

Holding Secrets, Holding Sacred


Dharma Cowgirl

Post card received by Post Secret, an online blog that people send anonymous post cards to with their secrets. (postsecret.com) Post card received by Post Secret, an online blog that people send anonymous post cards to with their secrets. (postsecret.com)

People tell me things, deep, painful, secret things. It’s part of the work of chaplains, why we exist. We are the conduit of their unburdening. This is a beautiful function of the human connection. Can you imagine it: healing a little just by sharing? How marvelous! We do it all the time, every day. When we tell our boyfriend how our day was, or complain to our best friend about our boss, we are healing through sharing through connection. We need each other to witness our lives and we witness for others. But because this is such a powerful need, we are sometimes afraid to share and afraid to witness the deep, hard, suffering parts. We don’t want to risk the connection. These are the burdens we keep and carry…

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There are people in my computer


Delusions Of Candour

When I was a young child I was utterly convinced that there were tiny people in the radio. I envisioned them sitting at tiny desks to read the news, playing and singing in tiny bands. Fast forward 30-odd years and we find me married, a mother of 2, struggling with problems with both my physical health and mental health.

And now it’s not my radio but my computer that seems to have people in. Some of these people I know in real life; most of them I don’t. Sometimes we have silly conversations about daft news stories and what our children have been up to or whatever comes to mind. Sometimes I’m able to help someone with a breastfeeding problem or a baking problem, and they offer advice on my health problems and child-rearing.

And sometimes I talk to the people in my computer when I can’t talk to anyone…

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Hello, I’m Unemployed



I hate being unemployed. I have been cowering under this title for a little over a month now. My ‘home office’ is a shrine to a particular type of insanity that I adopt when I have far too much idle time. At my desk I relish the few short hours of plotting and scheming before I am reminded about my harsh reality. It usually takes something seemingly insignificant to propel me back towards the sharp pavement of this middle earth. Sometimes its a song, or a plane flying overhead full of people who are going places and doing things. In fact, just yesterday, I developed an unhealthy resentment towards our mailman who carries out his duties with irritating promptness. Oh yes, that’s another thing, I wait for the mail to come. No need to reread, you saw it correctly the first time. I await the mail each day. Based on…

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Mediocrity is a Killer. Don’t Settle for it!


Writer. Musician. Life Photographer

mocha moments A young male on a game site player forum recently posted “So up until now like every other child ever, I thought I was special or had the potential of climbing to the top. But as inevitable as the tides everyone must eventually grow up to realize that, there is nothing you truly excel at and therefore destined to a life of mediocrity. Now I am having some trouble and have a hard time accepting the fact that I do not have any outstanding talent; my name will not be remembered nor written in any history books. Heck when I die nobody will probably remember me at all, and the thought of that just depresses me as I have always been a believer in “either you are best or you are trash.” So as I am feeling pretty helpless and I guess desperate since I am asking an internet forum…

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The Single Most Annoying Trick People use To Get Your Attention


Just Alyssa

woman-butt-fit What’s the single most annoying trick that people do to get your attention? Headlines like this one. Especially if they’re coupled with photos like this one, which, by the way, has nothing whatsoever to do with what I intend to write about. It’s just a woman’s butt, which is the most surefire way to get people to click on a link. Especially connected with declarations and promises.

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Writing Cycles, Writing Funks


The Incompetent Writer

Lunch break

One of the funny things about writing a blog is that you see, on the screen in front of you, plain evidence of the upswings and downswings of your time, inspiration, and urge to write. You know when you haven’t posted much in a while.

It’s a very odd thing, however, how little the conscious mind seems aware of these flows of energy and strength. I might detect, consciously, no reason why I can’t sit down and write another paragraph of a story, or draft that little essay on Paco di Lucia that I had planned, and yet once I’ve been sitting at my desk for a time, and been unable to write much, it suddenly occurs to me that I’ve been away from home three weekends in a row. Simply speaking, I’ve exhausted myself and need to take a break.

My artistic well–which resides somewhere in the brain far…

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5 Reasons You Should Never Settle

5 Reasons You Should Never Settle

James Michael Sama

As I sit here to write this article, I’m in our hotel room overlooking the beach. The waves sound so close you feel like you can put your hand out the window and touch them. My girlfriend is making coffee. Her tanned skin is accentuated even further by the stark white walls. The rays of sun are coming through the blinds signaling a new day has begun. Michael Bublé is permeating the room from my laptop speakers.

Next to me on the table is this month’s copy of Esquire, the cover of which is beckoning us with “84 Things A Man Should Do Before He Dies.” And I sit here thinking to myself – no matter how many failures I face or how hard life becomes, I refuse to settle.

You can settle for less than you deserve in many areas of life. A job you can’t stand going to…

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